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2010-04-25T22:23:00.004-05:00

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This Blog has Moved.

2008-11-26T20:47:00.005-06:00

After six years of blogging at this address, I have seen the light and am abandoning Blogger like so many digital lemmings before me. All the content has migrated to my new site, and the links to this one should remain ok, but nothing more will be posted here.

What's this mean for you? If you're reading this via RSS, all transmissions will cease. Please go to the new site - www.RandyBohlender.com - and click on the new feed, or choose to have the new feed emailed to you directly.

A few more features and links will be added in the next few days, but again - this blog is dead, yet lives, here. Please update your links.

Thanks to Ellen Karns, former VCC Web Girl, for helping me and tweaking the layout. OK, bending the layout beyond recognition. Thanks also to Shelley Paulson for taking every picture of me that does not look dumb, including the one in the new header.

Timing is Everything

2008-11-26T10:38:00.003-06:00

As previously mentioned, I'm listening to Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers audiobook...and now wishing I had the hard copy in my hand, because I can't find the quote I'm looking for.

In a synopsis, Gladwell lays out the case that almost all titans of technology were born in a narrow window of time. For example...

Bill Joy - Founding team, Sun Microsystems - November 8, 1954
Scott McNealy - Founding team, Sun Microsystems - Nov 13, 1954
Vinod Khosla - Founding team, Sun Microsystems - Jan 28, 1955
Steve Jobs - Apple Computers - Feb 24, 1955
Andy Bechtolsheim, Founding team, Sun Microsystems - June 1955
Bill Gates - Microsoft - Oct 28, 1955
Steve Ballmer - Microsoft CEO - March 24, 1956

Gladwell goes on to list a bunch of lesser known, behind the scenes people and their birthdays, all into an 24 month window. While they all certainly are bright men and women, they are not arguably smarter than those who came before or after them. While they are hard workers, they do not work harder or longer than any other generation.

What was it about that window of time that produced a micro-sliced generation of high achievers?

Timing.

These men came into adulthood at a time when computers were behemoths that took up entire rooms, but the wheels of innovation were already turning...and their minds were free to think about making computers smaller and affordable - perhaps even putting one on your desk.

Had they been born five years earlier, they would have been entrenched in careers that were build on large mainframe computers. Being creative would have put their livelihood in jeopardy. They couldn't have afforded to put years into small computers - they would have had a mortgage to pay and babies to raise.

Had they been born five years later, they would have missed the revolution and been relegated to being a footsoldier in a new guard of electronics and software companies.

Gates, Jobs and others became who they are by hard work, by cleverness, and by the unique opportunity afforded them by a narrow window of time.

This post has nothing to do with computers. It has to do with questions I'm asking myself right now...because in a sense, we were all born on our own 4th of July, 1955.

For every person born, there is a unique opportunity to shift history, to change the game, to invent what was not possible a few years earlier and won't be amazing a few years later. We all have our own window of time.

So I'm asking...

What time is it right now?

What opportunities are being afforded us that have never been afforded others before...and will be passe in short order.

What is just through this window of time, and how many of us can get through the window before time slams it shut forever?

I have a hunch

2008-11-24T00:07:00.003-06:00

I filled our Suburban up for about $38 yesterday. Even as I did the happy dance, I know it can't last.

I have little more than intuition to peg this on, but mark my words - these gas prices are not here to stay. They may last a week or a month, and they may even go a little bit lower, but they're getting ready to skyrocket back where they were this summer or higher.

Helping form my conviction on this:

1) People have already assured Big Oil that we will pay $4+/gallon. Yes, we might drive a little less, but not half as much as we do at $2. They can sell less and make more at $4/gallon.

2) Very few people want to hear politicians talk about alternative energy. This dip in gas prices reassures people that we don't really need to worry about using anything other than oil, further diminishing their interest. The only thing we are burning faster than oil is time....time that should be spent on research but won't be, because gas is cheap again.

3) Markets are driven by speculation, not production. Look at the recent stock market activity. It swings wildly day to day - is that because the stocks intrinsic value fluctuates that fast? No it's because the number of people who bet that someone else is dumber than they are is skyrocketing. Oil will fluctuate just as quickly.

Fill your tanks, friends. And your barrels and your pitchers and your swimming pools. $4 gas will be back sooner than you think.

audio books or print?

2008-11-23T21:24:00.003-06:00

I saw an advertisement today for a free download of Malcolm Gladwell's new book, 'Outliers'. Of course, until I followed all the links, I was signing up for a 14 day trial of Audible.com, which I have no intention of keeping.

This is my second audio book of recent weeks, but to be frank, I'm not a big fan. First of all, I read way faster than most audio book readers. They take a LONG time to listen too...plus I talk to people and get talked to by people most of the day, so sitting down and hearing only the voice(s) in my head is more calming than you can imagine. Audio books seem like an extended meeting to me - one that I can't respond to. That said, it's hard to resist free Gladwell. :)

Comparing the two books - Gladwell's 'Outliers' and Seth Godin's 'Tribes', I'd pick Gladwell over Godin even though I'm only 20 minutes into 'Outliers'. It's not that Godin doesn't have good material. In fact, it's almost E.W. Kenyonesque in that I could listen for 5 minutes and shut it off and think for 30. He speaks in sound bites that actually bite and force you to apply them to your own situation.

Gladwell wins for one reason: Story telling.

No one tells a story like the Canadian-cum-neurotic-New-Yorker Malcom Gladwell. He speaks with clarity and intensity, but also with a quizzical sound in his voice, as if he's discovering the story along with you. Think a younger Garrison Keillor minus the Minnesota flavor and restricted to fact.

Godin makes me think of a million applications of his one, eight word thought....but Gladwell makes me want to listen to him.

Plus, he's got that wicked cool hair.

up and nearly at'm

2008-11-21T06:14:00.006-06:00

It's a quarter past 6am. I've been up for about an hour, feeding the girls who slept their longest stretch ever - nearly 6 1/2 hours - and went right back to sleep after their bottles. I'm so thankful I want to wear a pilgrim hat and buckle shoes today.

Kelsey is feeling...pregnant. She gets tired pretty quickly, although it should be noted that the woman stewards six children, three of who poop their pants at random, and an oddball husband. That, and she gives herself shots in the abdomen twice daily, leaving bruises that would lead one to believe she lost a game of paintball. And then she apologizes. "I'm sorry I'm tired...I don't mean to complain...". She and I are made out of very different stuff. Kryptonite Mom vs. Puddin Pops.

Jackson took a few photos of der vundertwins. You can click on either to see the full size version. As near as I can tell from the photos, the first one is of Mercy Rain. The one below is Anna River.

The girls are over 9lbs now and their personalities are really beginning to shine. Mercy is the more vocal of the two, not in a whiney way, but more in the mold of a prophetic singer, which is find with us. She is a little bigger and her hair is slightly lighter in color.

Anna, on the other hand (often literally on the other hand) is a little more demure, although secretly I think she's plotting the writing of her tell-all book, "I Was Adopted By The Strangest Family on the Planet And Turned Out Fine", available on Amazon in the spring of 2028.

If it sounds like all we do is laugh and play with these girls...it's because we are reporting on the highlights of the day. We are still intercessory missionaries. We still pay the bills, scrub the floor, read the news and drink a lot of coffee. It's just that our lives have been willingly hijacked by two half Asian beauties who we find irresistible.

In the "Not Half Asian But We Still Love Her" category, I had to post a photo of our dear friend Annie, who in characteristic sympathy for our plight, brought over this killer double layer chocolate cake complete with toasted coconut on the icing.

This may have been the most Martha Stewart thing I've ever seen done by a teenager. We are plotting ways to keep her in Kansas City, and I am not above sabotaging her college essays by inserting words like "booger" at random.

Thank you, Annie! The tribe loves you, and if we ever carve a totem pole, you are TOTALLY going on top, far out of reach of the dreaded pigeon zone.

This rings a bell

2008-11-19T21:56:00.002-06:00

We can put a man on the moon but we can't remember to pick up our tools. Honestly, though, I must have lost a thousand dollars worth of my dad's tools growing up on the farm. I found some weird satisfaction in this story.

Lost tool bag forces changes to planned spacewalks

HOUSTON (AP) - Flight controllers were revamping plans Wednesday for the remaining spacewalks planned during space shuttle Endeavour's visit to the international space station, after a crucial tool bag floated out to space during a repair trip.

The briefcase-sized tool bag drifted away from astronaut Heidemarie Stefanyshyn-Piper on Tuesday as she cleaned and lubed a gummed-up joint on a wing of solar panels on the space station. She and fellow astronaut Stephen Bowen were midway through the first of four spacewalks planned for the mission. The tool bag was one of the largest items ever lost by a spacewalker.

A rare youtube link

2008-11-18T09:16:00.002-06:00

I very rarely post odd youtube videos, but this is so true that it cannot be ignored. It's also a little painful when you recognize yourself.

I have no idea who this guy is, but you're only laughing because you see yourself. Two profundities - "everything is amazing, but nobody is happy...." and "...used to be, if you ran out of money, you couldn't do any more things...".

Via MondayMorningInsight.com

thought fragment...

2008-11-18T07:20:00.002-06:00

This idea will reappear later in a more thoroughly written blog, but I just wanted to toss it out there this morning while it was fresh in my mind.

I was up this morning praying for my family. It seems to take longer to do that every week. :) As I prayed, I pondered the nature of Satan's rage toward children. They are not just at risk because of their innocence. It's as if he's gunning for them.

Babies are targeted in the womb for elimination. If they survive, they spend their childhood in a world in surrounded by adults who are entertained by images and ideas that would be considered detrimental to their spirit. They are immersed in a culture that speaks to them as if their youth is to be despised. 'Childlike' is an admirable quality, yet they are told over and over, 'grow up'.

Why the war on children and childhood?

Then I was reminded of Psalm 8:2. From the lips of children and infants, I have ordained praise. Into their DNA, God has written a holy song, and Satan is trying for all he's worth to throw a sour note into the lifesong they have been given, because he knows that their song defeats his purposes.

Satan does not rage against children because they're vulnerable. He rages against them because they are dangerous.

It is a privilege to raise a house full of dangerous kids.

And in other developments...

2008-11-17T22:19:00.003-06:00

It's hard to top last night's announcement that we were expecting our seventh child.

Kelsey made the prenatal pilgrimage to the professional today who professed that she positively is pregnant, which we knew. They also prescribed an expensive medication that she will inject into her stomach via syringe every day due to an autoimmune disorder that she has. She did this with Zion as well. Tonight, she took her first injection and found that it burned like fire. I ran downstairs for a minute and came up to find her sitting on the floor of the kitchen, afraid she was going to pass out. In the end, she didn't...but it wasn't fun. She went directly to bed.

In better news, we received an offer on our house last night. After a few back and forths, we landed on a price with the buyer. The home inspection in scheduled for Friday afternoon. All is this fantastic news for us - the current house was short on space and the layout was not conducive to a tribe of our size.

These are interesting days. We are in need of more space. The housing market is such that one could buy more house for less than one might have a year ago, but honestly, it's going to take a miracle to get what we need. Fortunately, we've seen a string of miracles for the past five years.

Since the week before leaving for IHOP, we have been given four vehicles. Granted, the first three had a cumulative total of over a half million miles on them, but they honestly all ran well. I gave two away and sold one. The fourth is the mighty Johnny Cash Tour Bus Edition Suburban that still hauls my entire family (until around July, in which case....uh, I don't have that figured out yet).

Somehow, we have managed to raise a growing family on missions support for five years. People erroneously assume that since we've done it this long we know how to do it. We don't. We send out newsletters, we pray, and God provides, seemingly with very little connection to the newsletters. More than once, we have received large checks days (or even hours) before a large bill was due.

We adopted three infants in less than two years. I still can't fully explain that one.

All that to say God's got the cattle on a thousand hills, and He's going to clear off one of those hills and build us a house. I just know it. There will be room for all seven kids, Kelsey and I, and Grandma B.

Ten people, five ethnicities, three generations, one family.

This feels a little like heaven, and God's going to make sure He's got a place to live.

Father Abraham / Had many sons

2008-11-16T22:08:00.004-06:00

In case you missed the twitternado earlier tonight (and I understand there are as many as six of you who refuse to use Twitter. That's ok, but you're last one to the Info Buffet), Kelsey and I twittered an announcement that went roughly like this:

@kbohlender - I feel sick....

@rbohlender - You ok? Symptoms?

@kbohlender - Sick to my stomach, tired all the time. Ya know, the usual for the condition.

@rbohlender - That's right folks. @kbohlender has a bun in the oven. this is not a joke.

We found out two days ago that Kelsey is expecting. Yes, it's number 7. Yes, it will mean 4 children under the age of 3. Yes, we know what causes this (although someone told us that if we had a TV, it might not have....).

We are overfreakingjoyed. This is as glorious and in the perfect will of God as any adoption. I have a TON of thoughts around large families and God's plan for the earth. Some will make your head spin, and I hope to blog them soon. Suffice it to say that we're happy. We're laughing maniacally in a way that might suggest we're off our meds, but we're also truly happy.

All things God are good.

Sing it with me now. Father Abraham / Had many sons....many sons had Father Abraham

Adoption v. Abandonment: Court is now in session.

2008-11-14T15:32:00.001-06:00

There is a hard to quantify, yet hard to deny reality that the spirit world operates something akin to mathematics at times. Truth works no matter how you approach the equation. X is elusive, yet it is the glory of kings to search it out. And for every positive action or number, there is an equal and opposing reaction.

We are seeing that play out in a very real, very tragic way.

The prophet Malachi delivered an oracle from God describing the time nearing the end of days:

Malachi 4:5,6
Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the LORD. And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the earth with a curse.

We may not agree on what the great and dreadful day of the Lord means in specifics, but most of us agree that a) today isn’t it and b) it’s closer today than it was yesterday. In light of those two points, it would do us all well to take a long, hard look at the things God says are to come.

One of the positives to come will be a great adoption movement - figurative and literal - as the hearts of the generations turn 180 degrees to face one another and the church rediscovers a wholeness lost long ago.

Not many years ago, people primarily adopted because they were unable to conceive. That’s no longer the biggest reason. Increasingly, I’m meeting people who are adopting for more proactive, spiritual reasons - as prophetic declarations of God’s heart for children. I believe is a foreshadowing of Malachi’s promise.

Of course, there is a negative reality as well. Even as the church discovers the spirit of adoption, there is a radical display of child abandonment happening in Nebraska. Not long ago, Nebraska instituted a Safe Haven Law, promising clemency to anyone who, unable to care for a child, would surrender them to a hospital or police station.

The thought was they would safe a number of infants from poor care or abuse. Never in their wildest dreams did they expect what would happen next. Rather than infants being delivered to hospitals by teen parents, children as old as seventeen are being flown across the country and dropped off by parents who are at their wits end as to how to deal with them.

In the past few days alone, three teenagers and a five year old were brought from as far away as Miami, Florida by four different parents. In one case, a 17 year old girl and her 14 year old brother were dropped at an Omaha hospital. When the girl figured out what was happening, she ran way, preferring to face the world on her own than in state custody. Her brother did not go with her. It's hard to tell who got the better deal.

State lawmakers are in shock. "Please don't bring your teenager to Nebraska," Gov. Dave Heineman told CNN. "Think of what you are saying. You are saying you no longer support them. You no longer love them."

There’s no way to tell the conditions from which these kids may be being spared. In some - if not most cases - they actually may be better off in a foster home. I can’t imagine a child living long term with an parent who would prefer to abandon them.

That being said, the greater issue is what this says about our culture. Kids are commodities, not responsibilities. Parenting is a magazine, not a life of sacrifice. When it gets hard, help is only as far away as Nebraska.

Good God, what have we become.

The church must embrace these kids and thousands of others with spiritual and temporal adoption. It will not be pretty, easy, or fun. It will be obedience. They are not the prom queens or football stars we thought we would raise...but their reception by the body of Christ will be the barometer of what will come.

Hear the words of the prophet, and the warning therein.

And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the earth with a curse.

Didn't feel that one coming.

2008-11-14T08:57:00.004-06:00

I've often mentioned my overall disdain for television. For a hundred reasons, we kind of checked out of TV land about ten years ago, and every time I peak back in, I find a reason to cringe. I'm only saying that to point out the unlikeliness of what's happened.

I have been binge-watching the canceled CBS series Jericho during the twins' late night feeding. By bing-watching, I mean four times a week or so, although I will admit to one or two nights of watching a two-fer. Don't panic, it can't last forever. They only produced two seasons of the show.

This is especially odd given that about a year ago I watched an episode from season two out of context and immediately pronounced it dumb. Don't get me wrong - I still don't think of it as great television. The acting can be bad, but the storyline is intriguing. Essentially, the US is victim of a mass nuclear attack. The plot follows the small, Kansas town of Jericho and how they deal with the aftermath.

All that to say that last night, I watched a scene that hit me far differently than I would have expected. In this particular episode, Johnston Greene, former mayor of the town and patriarch of the Greene family, is shot in a gunfight with a rival town and later dies on a friend's kitchen table with his two grown sons at his side.

His boys, in their early 30's, are stereotypical - the good, dull son who stayed in Jericho and the younger, exciting, slightly bad-boy who returned to redeem himself by knowing the ways of war. Together, these three pulled off one of the most touching death scenes I've ever watched. What surpised me, though, was not their emotions - it was my reaction.

My dad died when I was 28 years old. Knowing full well it was coming, I stood at the foot of his bed and watched the heart monitor flat line. I clearly remember telling Kelsey "I'm too young to not have a dad." Thirteen years later, I still feel that. I miss him every day.

Under normal circumstances, upon seeing this scene, I'd relate to the sons...their emotions, their pain, their loss. Unexpectedly, last night, watching there on the couch with a daughter in arms, I found myself relating to the dying father.

In saying his goodbyes, he grabbed his younger son's hand and whispered "I was too hard on you. I was...too hard on you, son." His dying words - the most intentionally chosen of any man's life - reflected a tenderness and very real pain.

It's interesting that in this case, almost no one would say "I wish I would have been harder on you. I wish I would have punished you. I wish I would have whipped you into shape."

"I was too hard on you." That was his dying emotion...the sum of all feelings regarding his son.

I swallowed hard and relived a few scenes of my own in my head.

We're all living out our death scene, in some respect. Admit it. We're dying. Now or later, we're dying. Why would we talk one way now and another later?

I looked at my boys differently this morning. I know what I want to say to them, and I don't want to wait to say it. It''s far less harsh than it would be if I were going to live in this state forever.

Amish Law and Order

2008-11-13T21:59:00.003-06:00

In the criminal justice system, the people are entertained by two separate yet equally important groups: the Amish, who presume their own guilt, and the cows, who wear the RFD's.

These are their stories.

--------

From the Wired Blog

The Bush administration on Thursday urged a federal judge to dismiss a lawsuit brought by a group of Amish farmers in Michigan claiming RFID chips required on cattle "are a mark of the beast."

The Amish farmers claim Michigan regulations requiring them to use radio frequency identification devices on their cattle "constitutes some form of a 'mark of the beast' and/or represents an infringement of their 'dominion over cattle and all living things' in violation of their fundamental religious beliefs," according to the farmers' lawsuit (pdf) filed in September in U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia.

read it all here

Listen to Ren...

2008-11-13T15:54:00.003-06:00

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 says - and Kevin Bacon later agreed - that there is a time for all things. A time to be born, to die, to plant, to uproot, to kill, to heal, to tear down, to build up, to weep, to laugh, to mourn and to dance. The message of the passage is not a dismissive ‘stuff happens’, but rather profound ‘stuff happens at certain times, and times change, and other stuff happens’. For crying out loud, I sound like I’m writing The Message.

I’ve been big on the rhythm of life - the idea that things happen in patterns and if you can be patient with the pattern of it, you can sustain life a long time. Fight the rhythm and you’re never happy. Succumb to the rhythm and you find the dance.

That said, I think I’m beginning to find the rhythm again, after having been knocked silly with the schedule of twins + adjusting to having a family of six children (two different things, I’m learning). Adding twins is like having a baby x 2. Oddly enough, that’s the easier adjustment. It takes longer to feed, to diaper, to play....but you know that in a few years, that’s passed and they’re fairly self sustaining. Having 2 babies fades away. Having six kids? Not so much. In four years, when the twins are off playing in the back yard, I'll still have six kids. At least. :)

One of the changes I had to make was in abandoning my beloved 6am in the prayer room. For five years, I kept that post, rarely missing a day. The 4pm has replaced the 6am for the most part, and it would have been easier to get used to driving on the wrong side of the road. Early mornings are now invested in making sure the tribe is up and moving the right direction before I leave Kelsey to hold the fort. I find myself in the prayer room at a strange time, with strange people, less jacked on caffeine and a little more tired than I used to be....

So I’m adjusting. Looking for a rhythm...and it’s all good.

To quote Ren McCormack, “I thought this was a party. LET'S DANCE! “

Behind the scenes...

2008-11-12T09:09:00.002-06:00

I love TheCall. I love what it stands for and how it does it. I also love the off beat things that happen back stage....

We had a large contingency of Catholics join us in California - more than any other event. We also had a Catholic Bishop lead in prayer late in the afternoon. He was a very pleasant little Mexican fellow who patiently waited behind the stage, enduring our multiple schedule shifts until it was his turn.

A few minutes before he went on, he motioned for me to come down off the stage. When I did, he shouted in my ear over the sound of the band. Between the accent and his collar, all I could think of was Nacho Libre.

He said "Dey ask me to not pray to de saints, and not to pray de rosary..."

I nod, not quite sure where this is going. He continues....

"Is it ok if I cast out de devils and bind dem to hell?"

I don't remember what I said exactly, but I assured him that he was correct. No to saints and the rosary, thumbs up to casting out devils and binding them to hell.

That's good theology right there.

An Open Letter to Barack Obama

2008-11-10T23:05:00.006-06:00

November 10, 2008

Dear Mr. President-elect,

After the last election, I wrote to President George Bush. While he never actually acknowledged my letter publicly, I know that he was a big fan of the Google and trust he saw it somewhere.

I don't believe in perfunctory niceties, Senator, so I'll level with you. I voted for the other guy. Actually, I voted more for the lady with the other guy, but that's a whole 'nother letter. Even so, I'm excited for our nation in some respects. It will be interesting to have a president with at least a sliver of coolness. I'm too young to remember JFK, but you're closer to him in iconic standing than any of those I've known. I'm proud of America. We have evolved to a point where an African American can get elected to the highest office in the land. My adopted daughter - African American and Latino descent - is 2 years old and will never remember a time when this was impossible. That is progress for all of us.

No doubt, there are a lot of people clamoring for your attention right now, and that's not likely to slow up much, so I'm going to get right to the point on a couple of things that mean a lot to me. You might want to even bookmark this page. File it under "nutty evangelicals" if it helps you find it again later.

I'm concerned about national security. The past seven years have shown us that there are some very bad people in the world and the reserve a special kind of hate for Americans. I know you've talked about sitting down with certain people who've been labeled terrorists, believing that it's better to talk to our enemies than to ignore them. Please do not oversimplify the world scene to a disagreement between neighbors that can be settled on the patio over a couple of cold ones. I know a lot has gone wrong - particularly in the last four years - but you have to admit, for all the things that blew up and burned down on President Bush's watch, he managed to blow them up or burn them down overseas, not within our borders.

I'm troubled by our financial situation. I'm not horribly concerned about Wall Street, because I'm convinced that most of the value that has been lost on Wall Street was not value at all, but rather hype. Decades ago, a CEO woke up and asked "are we making good widgets?" For the last few years, a CEO wakes up and asks "what's our stock price?" It's a very different perspective that lends itself to an intricate form of gambling where value is derived speculation rather than production. We could stand to get back to producing a few things. What does concern me, though, is people losing jobs or finding themselves upside down with easy credit. I vote you prop up employers as necessary and crack down on ridiculous credit terms. Yes, people should be smart enough to understand the idea of "too good to be true...", but they're not, and to teach them all a lesson the hard way right now is going to make the value of our homes plummet even though we've been responsible enough to make the payments.

I am burdened for the lives of the unborn. My gut says that you have regretted that "above my pay grade" comment you made to Rick Warren since the moment you said it. My gut also says that you have a nagging question....one that arises when you look at your beautiful little girls. In the dark of night, when you slip into their room to take one last peek, I think you hear the whispers in the walls. "Before I formed you in your womb, I knew you... " I won't argue science or religion with you, Mr. President-elect. Just stare hard at your daughters and ask three questions "When did they begin? How do I know? What if I'm wrong?"

Sir, you are in my prayers. You are about to undertake a job that no man would have unless he loved America. I believe that you do. I don't believe you to be any more sinister or righteous than your campaign opponent was, and I will pray for your encounter with the Living God just as I would for whoever else won. May you know Him and experience Him fully, and may your leadership over our nation reflect that encounter.

Sincerely

Randy Bohlender

Best part of the day....

2008-11-07T15:49:00.001-06:00

Best part of the day....introducing Angela Wheeler Solomon to a someone at Crossroads by saying "She used to work for me at the Vineyard."

No matter how hard she protested, the person never really figured out that I wasn't her boss.

We need a Pastor Pageant

2008-11-06T09:28:00.003-06:00

Live, from the Orpheum Theatre:

Rick Warren v. Billy Graham

If you follow the links, you'll see The Nation has crowned Warren, but CNN tells us Graham is still the reigning pastor. Controversy! Religion! This story has it all.

I suggest a Pastor Pageant with some Sarah Palinesque 'fancy pageant walkin'. Maybe a Funeral-off, baby dedicating for speed, etc. Any ideas?

morning ruminations...

2008-11-06T06:38:00.002-06:00

The sun is beginning to poke up over the church building across the street that serves as our eastern horizon. It's playing off the gorgeous color that hangs from all of the oak trees lining our street...yellow, orange, red and a color that can only be called redder or Extreme Red Makeover.

Truly, this is the great and terrible season of the oak tree. They are at once a deciduous and apocalyptic sight. At this moment, with my laptop before me and my trusty coffee mug at my side, they are glorious....however, as those leaves continue fall like the stock market, we find the transition between the sacred and profane.

Forerunner School of Ministry freshman had some sort of service hours to do this week. For three days straight, two nice young men showed up at my door at 9am and raked their little hearts out, redefining theological education in the context of night and day yard work.

They would work for 2 to 3 hours, but leaves were falling so fast that even before they left, it was hard to see that they'd done anything (although they managed to rake, mulch and bag TWENTY bags of leaves, saving me hours of work!).

Thanks, guys. Your work is not in vain, even though it appeared as if it were. Now go study Sisyphus with a new understanding.

TheCall meets the UFC

2008-11-04T00:13:00.004-06:00

As I mentioned yesterday, we had what shall forever be memorialized as 'the jumper incident' on Saturday night at Qualcomm Stadium in San Diego.

What I did not know was that our own Shelley Paulson photo documented the whole thing. I should have assumed this. She shoots constantly. Actually, I'm grateful, as these are the only recent photos that Shelley has taken of me in which I am not fiddling with my Blackbery.

Here are three shots that give you the general idea.

As you can see, I am about to unleash the wrath on this guy.

Actually, not so much.

Two things surprise me about the photo above. First, that he got much closer to Lou than I thought he did - I thought it all happened center stage, about 10 feet to the right. Also, in my mind, I got there before the security guy did but that's obviously not true. Adrenalin is a funny thing.

By this shot a second or two later, Security was coming out of the woodwork. Several more piled in before it was over. He will not forget this incident.

And here's the end game, as he gets the escort out on the command of Marcos (head of the security detail - black shirt). I get a real kick out of Marcos' finger pointing - "he's outta there!". Meanwhile, Gabe Ahn turns to cue the band - "Na na, Na na na na, hey hey, goodbye!"

TheCall Cali in a nutshell

2008-11-02T10:07:00.002-06:00

We spent yesterday at Qualcomm Stadium in support of TheCall California. Of course, now we get the repeated question 'how did it go?', so I'll try and give you the highlights in one fell swoop. Dig Shelley Paulson's excellent photostream here.

Attendance.

Who knows. More than I could count, fewer than I'd hoped. One newspaper said 33,000, and I'd say that's fair. There were a good 8,000 on the field between the end zone and the far 20 yard line, which made for a great feel from the stage, but left some real gaps in the stands. I was encouraged with Jim Garlow's words the night before - that if we come to do business, it really doesn't matter how many show up. That said, I still wish we would have filled it. :)

Peeps

I love TheCall team. You could not buy this kind of loyalty or good attitudes. Digital hats off to the portion of the team who labored in California in advance for the two months leading up to TheCall. We are glad you're coming home. Also good to reunite with Miss Alysha, who served us so well in the office during the regional tour and DC. She's gone off to get an education but took the weekend to fly and be with us, where she worked hard all day long.

Speakers/Prayer Leaders

Love him or hate him, you cannot deny that James Dobson has influenced two generations of American Christians. He and his wife, Shirley, spent a good number of hours on the stage. They were very gracious and kind to anyone who connected with them.

Pat Boone arrived mid afternoon and stayed until the very end, sporting white boots and telling a story about Jimmy Hendrix back in the day. He was a chatterbox in the wings and seemed like a guy I'd like to have lunch with.

Allen Hood shared a chilling dream he had from the Lord, regarding what he called 'the drunkenness of California. It was the most sober moment of the day for me.

The usual cohorts of Lou, Mike Bickle, Dutch Sheets and others were there as well. After doing so many, TheCall has a family feel sidestage. I like that.

Musicians

Straight up, I'm forgetting people. Important people, so I won't bother mentioning most of them and no one feels bad.

I love Radiant - they show up full force and play at 8:30am to 70,000 empty seats and One Supreme Guest. Then they go stand in the crowd and yell and sing and pray and dance like there's no tomorrow. This, friends, is character, and Richy and Jess and Peeps have it. I've got tears in my eyes thinking about it.

I could have listened to Christine Mueller sing her San Francisco song all night long.

Another standout for me was Gabe Ahn. I'd never heard him lead before, but he carried the tired crowd through a raucus set to close the day, including the fastest ever played rendition of "Undignified" ever played.

Oddball

Fifteen minutes before we pulled the plug, near the end of Gabe's set, I was sitting on a gear box on the far right side of the stage. I joked to my peeps "It doesn't seem quite like TheCall because we haven't had to throw anyone out yet."

Three minutes later, on the far side of the stage, some guy leaps the bike rack and climbes up on the stage. The peeps around me later told me me I said something like "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, WHOA!" as I bolted past the guests on stage and raced toward the guy. By this time, he was on his feet and headed for Lou full boogey with a wild look in his eye.

We were set to collide front center stage - I was hoping I could throw him off the front of the stage if necessary. Of course, at this point, something occured to me - that which I was attempting might actually happen. I might actually be the first guy to reach this nut, in which case I wasn't quite sure what was going to happen.

About the time I reach him and go to grab his sweatshirt, a minimum of six security guards (on loan from the International Church of Las Vegas) land on the guy from all sides. Honestly, it might have been eight or ten. All I know is they put a world of hurt on him in a very short amount of time.

With the band still rocking, I glance up at Gabe, who has walked around his monitor and is yelling at the guy "Look at me! Look at me!" Turns out Gabe recognized him and was hoping to calm him down, but once you've rushed the stage and been tackled, it's hard to reenter negotiations as equals. I told the security guys to haul him off, which they did by his belt, pant legs, and ears. Frankly, the whole thing took far less to happen than it did to read - it was so crazy fast.

Today, we attend some meetings and tomorrow, we head back to Middle America so we can vote on Tuesday. As an event, TheCall Cali is in the box. As a value and a movement, it's just begun.

Good morning, San Diego....

2008-11-01T10:14:00.001-05:00

Here we go...

2008-10-31T16:58:00.000-05:00

Live on GOD-TV tomorrow, 10am-10pm Pacific.

Comin' at ya...

2008-10-28T15:30:00.005-05:00

Here are my homeboys Jonathan Mills and Downtown Steve Brown, just beginning to set up the stage at Quallcom stadium in San Diego. The build is Tues/Wed/Thurs/Fri and Saturday, we rumble! Nice collection of plywood there, Jonathan!

One more shot from present uber-assistant and hospitality princess, Sarah Kim...click it large and you'll see Ali Oop Watkins lower left, workin' the Crackberry.

I (heart) This Kid

2008-10-27T22:16:00.002-05:00

Zion had a soccer game tonight. This was big stuff, as the rest of the season's games are played on Saturday morning. This was the 7 year old soccer player's equivalent of a Monday Night Football game, minus Hank, Jr. singing "are you ready for some football!!!!"

Notable distinctions of the game included a bitterly cold wind, impromptu wrestling matches on the side lines, and Dwayne Roberts stopping us all in our tracks by yelling at the team "Give'm Hellllllllllp!" It should be noted that at the point of his yelling this, one of our players was getting overrun and needed some assistance, but by the time Dwayne got the 'p' on the end of 'hellllllllllp', Cory Russell and I were staring at him like he was a lunatic cursing a team of 7 year olds.

This is Zion's first season of soccer. He has shocked us all this year with his soccer prowess. This boy, born less than 6lbs light and knicknamed "Peanut" by the nurse, who now exudes a certain rock star cool and trademark dry sense of humor, is dead serious and intense about his soccer skills.

On game days, he puts his jersey on about six hours early. An hour later, he puts on his shin guards....and waits.

During the game, he leans forward - sometimes to the point of putting his opponent on their can in the grass. Tonight he threw a hip hard enough to wipe out a kid considerably bigger than him. They went sprawling on the grass while Zion scooted the ball around them and ran down field.

I would have cheered but it was a girl.

Go Dawgs

2008-10-26T22:29:00.002-05:00

I just became a Georgia Bulldogs fan, and I don't know jack about football. My friend, Greg, sent me a link to the video below, about University of Georgia head football coach, Mark Richt, and his wife, who adopted two children from the Ukraine, one of which was special needs.

Go Coach. Go Dawgs. Go God.

By the way, this is the 3,000th edition of Stuff I Think, and it's only appropriate that it's centered on the stuff I am thinking about most lately. If you've enjoyed anything of those last 3,000 posts, then watch the video for me.

Randomonium: Been a While Edition

2008-10-23T21:25:00.003-05:00

Hello friends It's been so long since I blogged that it's tough for me to whittle my thoughts down to one and blog on that, hence this edition of Randomonium.

We have tipped over from a large family to a mondo sized family...the size of which people make assumptions that you're Catholic, crazy or a member of Posse Comitatus. We are none of the three, but people sure do a double take when we pile out of the Suburban.

I am not, and will never be, a big fan of cold weather. It's cold and rainy tonight and I'm already looking forward to spring.

After a great heart connect with Jackson last night, we challenged one another to do something that neither of us would bite off on our own - to memorize the book of James together. I am NOT a memorization savant. I barely remembery my phone number. We landed on this as a way of redeeming those 10 minute sections of the day that one can zone out on - drive time, etc. Now I'm motivated to work on it because I don't want to get to our deadline and find out my son outdid me!

The last two Sundays' messages have been unbelievable...Daniel Lim is the prayer movement's 007 and Stuart Greaves is smart in languages I can't even recognize. There are more fascinating people at IHOP than most people meet in a lifetime.

Finally turned over 170,000 miles on my Montero. We've owned it seven years and have driven it from Colorado to Florida to Baltimore and all points inbetween. We wracked up 30k some years but lately haven't added so many. It's my favorite vehicle we have ever owned, even besting the oddball Merkur Scorpio we drove for a while. It's not quite Shawn Blanc's Man Jeep but it'll go nearly anywhere and arrive in style.

video update

2008-10-20T19:51:00.002-05:00

A Bad Sign

2008-10-19T22:47:00.002-05:00

Remember those yellow "Baby on Board" signs that were suction-cupped to every station wagon back in the 90's? They fell out of vogue when people figured out that accidents were, uh, accidents, and the presence of the sign didn't make a lot of difference except to those who were psychotic and left the house that morning thinking "I'm gonna wreck me some cars carrying babies...", and in that case, the sign was a liability because it made you an easy target.

I've also seen bumper stickers that said "TEEN DRIVER". Apparently that kid never thought of covering it up with duct tape and peeling the duct tape of when he got home. His sign should say "SLOW CHILDREN DRIVING".

Last week, though, I think I saw the worst of it. I was tooling down a four lane street and swung into the left lane to pass a sky-blue Saturn. As I did, I noticed a sign in the rear window - hand lettered, at that. It read "Senior Driver". I did a double take, and sure enough, there was a guy behind the wheel older than John McCain.

I couldn't help but wonder - did his children put the sign there? I tried to imagine the uncomfortable conversation that predicated that one. "Dad, we think you're a little dangerous. Not dangerous enough to pull you off the road, but you know, just a little scary, so we've made you a sign."

Or even weirder, did he make the sign HIMSELF? "Martha, I'm tired of hearing those horns non stop. If I just put up a sign, they'll give me some slack!".

I guess the universal sign of the Enternal Blinker just doesn't cut it anymore.

More download lovin'

2008-10-19T11:26:00.003-05:00

Just added to the sidebar - a link to the .pdf of an article I wrote for the inaugural edition of Neue Quarterly.

Mash here to get it for yourself.

Download a newsletter!

2008-10-17T12:08:00.005-05:00

We finally compiled the short version of the story of the twins adoption (for those of you who were unable to track the twitternado!).

You can download it now and read it in the comfort of your own recliner.

If you don't mind, forward it to someone else with a heart for adoption!

Neue on NeuMinistry.com

2008-10-16T22:13:00.002-05:00

Meeting Jesus' Other Half / by randy bohlender

It’s an interesting conundrum of fact and perception that God Almighty, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit are forever unchanging, and yet our theology - the specific thought set we have about them - is not. The very thoughts and feelings we have toward that which does not change changes over time. I’m thinking particularly about our Christology, which seems to swing, pendulum-like, between two of the facets of Jesus’ - redeemer on one side and judge on the other.

Let me preface this by saying that I grew up having had a brush with legalism. My family wasn’t really into it, but I had friends who were borderline Pentecostal Amish with their zeal for obscure rules. The rules varied from house to house. Some played cards, some didn’t, and a third group played but not on Sundays. Most didn’t dance, a few did if it were deemed in the Spirit, and even fewer just danced because they were happy, although that issue may have been more a reflection of how little happiness there was in that camp than any real dance conviction.

READ THE WHOLE ARTICLE HERE

any takers?

2008-10-14T15:33:00.002-05:00

Short, quirky bald man available to speak in a church in Cincinnati, Dayton, Indianapolis or points in between the weekend of Nov 7-10. Any takers? rbohlender (@) gmail.com

Here's your picture...

2008-10-14T14:31:00.001-05:00

early morning thoughts...

2008-10-14T05:48:00.002-05:00

We have six children and last night, I'm not sure if we ever had more than four asleep at any given time. That 2:3 sleep ratio is just not acceptable, although I finally gave up and came out on the couch with my Bible, so perhaps it was all for a good cause.

There's a lot to read about all that's wrong with our nation right now and who are the right people to fix it. I make no bones about being partisan, however, sitting here on the blue comfy couch, in a darkened room with a strong cup of Brazilian, I can quietly admit that there is not a person up for election than can truly fix our mess.

That's not to say that I don't have preferences (and believe that I'm right!), but we're working awfully hard to treat the symptoms of economic collapse, war, even genocide on our children, without attacking the root of the problem - we are a people with dark hearts, and if our sin of choice is legislated out of practicality, we will move on to another. It's who we are and what we do.

The world has not seen a truly righteous leader in 2000 years, and we killed Him when we last saw Him. That act revealed the heart of man more clearly than any other in history, and while we may have perfected the rubber tire and invented the circuit board since then, we haven't been able to fix our heart condition. It remains unlegislatable, uncontrolled, and unreconciled. That's the tension we live in.

I ran across a passage in Ezekiel 36 this morning that made my heart jump, though. It's the promise of God addressing the real issues of our society.

Ezekiel 36:26,27
I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees...

Father God, we ask that You would move quickly in your work of divine heart transplant, wooing us by Your Spirit to do that which is right. Without Your sovereign initiative, we are forever cursed with stone cold hearts and self made wills. Move us, God. Move us to follow you.

Some things do not change.

2008-10-13T23:14:00.001-05:00

In a fit of curiosity, I searched for people from North Dakota (my home state) who use Twitter. Of the few that popped up, on the first page I found these two posts from different individuals.

"Gettin' ready to work on my F150" and "I can't wait 'till May."

North Dakotans will understand.

This is what I come home to. EDIT

2008-10-13T16:46:00.003-05:00

Jerry Fallwell Junior, what are you thinking?

2008-10-12T22:09:00.004-05:00

This is not a rant, though some will suppose it to be. Granted, I'm irked, but I'm going to restrain myself and simply state the facts.

Soulforce is a nationwide bus tour that promotes acceptance for gays and lesbians on Christian college campuses. According to a recent USA today article, Liberty University has decided for the first time to allow them on campus to hand out literature, presumably to any closeted Liberty students looking for liberation.

Yes, that Liberty University. Jerry Fallwell well and all that. Why in God's name are they allowing this group on campus to promote a lifestyle on their campus that they would simultaneously denounce as sin? Is JF II's head in a bucket or what?

I can't explain it. Neither can I explain this. NeueMinistry.com, for which I periodically write, has taken a poll this weekend on whether or not Liberty should welcome them or stop them at the gate.

Currently, only 3 people cared enough to vote, and guess who is the odd man out? Yours truly.

So, go ahead, go here, and vote your conscience. And don't be pressured to change your vote by me or anyone else.

KC. A Fast City?

2008-10-12T15:43:00.002-05:00

Years ago, during the Web 1.0 explosion, we were pastoring a church populated primarily with young dot com types. They were all reading a magazine called Fast Company. It melded leadership, technology and innovation. I started reading it to keep up with my church folks.

Fast Company got faster and fatter until one day the bottom dropped out of their advertising market and the magazine began to look more like a leaflet. The price didn't drop, but the product became pretty slim, so I quit reading.

Turns out they still exist....and recently named Kansas City one of their annual 'Fast cities'...an award they give to geographical areas for being innovation friendly. So...what did they recognize in KC?

A $9 billion redevelopment is restoring downtown KC's shine with the new Sprint Center and Steven Holl's glorious expansion of the Nelson-Atkins Museum. This Missouri city also anchors a new animal-health corridor -- a bovine Silicon Valley -- that's home to more than 120 bioscience firms. The hope is that this old cow town's new spin will boost job growth and keep young people from seeking

Great. Four years into the Web 2.0 era and I find myself living in the bovine silicon valley.

At least IHOP's a fast community.

Phantastic Punkin afternoon.

2008-10-11T20:15:00.002-05:00

This is a great shot of John and I. If I remember right, I had just explained the Theory of Relativity to him, in relation to how drastically it changes at the quantum level. You can tell he's got that "Yeah, I got it" look on his face. We spend hours talking about this kind of stuff.

This is LiLi and Zoe nearing the finish line of the Punkin Eight Marathon. You didn't have to be a punkin to be in the race, but they both obviously are.

Thanks for these shots, Nick! More at Tracie's blog...

New on NeueMinistry.com

2008-10-10T11:07:00.001-05:00

What if the Financial Meltdown is God? / by randy bohlender

As I write this, millions of people are sitting at their jobs, pretending to work, yet all the while refreshing the Dow Jones page they have open in their browser, watching the fortunes of the nation evaporate. The government intervention of the past few days has done nothing to calm the markets, proving that the best intended legislation of man cannot overcome the innate fear of not-enough.

Now here's an idea...

2008-10-09T09:45:00.003-05:00

Mark Driscoll, the man's man and preacher most likely to punch you for being girlie, doing a sermon series on the Song of Solomon. You've got to see the preview and play "Whack a Fox!". Yes, a sermon series with a flash game.

Go to The Peasant Princess website, and remember - beware the little foxes. Whack'm with a mallet!

Mercy and Anna @ 3 wks.

2008-10-08T19:49:00.000-05:00

Why the Debate Stunk

2008-10-07T23:49:00.004-05:00

The debates have become a little like the Friday Night Fights. We look forward to them and ruefully admit that the build up is far superior to the actual event. Even so, tonight's Presidential Debate stunk worse than our lowest expectations. Here's why:

Questions by Undecided Votors

We are thirty days out from the elections in a campaign that has stretched on interminably long. I can't for the life of me remember when it started, but I am not sure I was even old enough to shave at the time.

These guys have argued the same points over and over and over again, first to gain the nomination, and now with one another. If you are still truly an decided voter after all these months of campaigning, then I question your good sense. I would go so far as to say that I don't think you should be allowed to ask questions - you obviously haven't been listening to the answers for the last year and a half. If you are unprepared to cast your vote now, I think you should give your vote up or have it granted to an illegal alien who has a vested interest in how this all shakes down.

The sort of people who are still undecided at t-minus 30 days are the kinds of people who ask "What don't you know.....". Oh. Wait. Exactly.

Barack Obama Channels My Fourth Grade Teacher

True confession: I did not like my 4th grade teacher. It may have been her fault, it may have been mine, but what little chemistry we had generated some noxious fumes. The sound of her voice was like fingernails on a chalkboard, but not as pleasant. I just grew tired of the "Yah, yah, yah...yayah ya yah yah" and tuned her out.

I did the same thing with BHO. (Lest you think I'm busting on the middle name, do you think he prefers being called 'BO'? I think not....). He has an irritating habit of talking to you like you're a fourth grader. A tardy fourth grader. A tardy fourth grader who will never amount to anything if you don't get on the ball and glue your freaking popsicle sticks to the map of china to mark the Great Wall.

He also does a VERY dumb thing in piling on statistics to the point of causing the listener to lose the plot. "Tom, in the last 48 months, 18 percent of Americans in the 35-50 age demographic lost a mean of $12,000 in home equity, causing 1 in 3 to cancel their health coverage until the next tax season - and we all know what that means."

No we do not, BHO, and IMHO, you don't know what you're talking about, so you just add up all your little numbers and let the buffalo chips fly.

John McCain's (lack of) Style

John McCain, I knew Ronald Reagan. Ronald Reagan was a friend of mine. You're no Ronald Reagan. I agree with you on a lot of positions - and on the one or two deal breakers that would cause me to hold my nose and vote for you, on those we're pretty much in sync....but for the love of country, man, please quit trying to be charming. It's creepy.

Conventional wisdom says a president needs a winning, gregarious personality. I disagree. I do not need a gregarious president. Sometimes, it's really not a good thing. Bill Clinton was probably the most gregarious of recent presidents, and his gregariousness overran his common sense on more than one occasion. I don't need the Prom King. I just need a guy who will do what he says and says what he does.

There is nothing more painful to watch than someone who is boring trying to be funny. John, it's ok to be boring if boring is who you are. What it is NOT ok to do is to try and be funny when funny is what you are not. When you are trying so hard to be funny, it comes off as both smarmy and condescending, my friend.

There you have it. The debate stunk.

Were it not for the twitterpatter of text messages throughout the event, it would have been a total waste. So. that was fun. When's the next one?

morning brain dump

2008-10-07T07:01:00.002-05:00

I'm sitting at the kitchen table. The light is low and the only sound I can hear is the hrrrrmmmmm of this little vibrating attachment that clips on to the baby bouncy thing (pardon my technical terms). Perched in the baby bouncy thing is Ms. Mercy Rain. She woke up before her sisters but now is finding some strange comfort in the gentle shaking and hrrrrmmmming. It sounds remarkably like my old Audi 5000 did when it was low on oil.

Yesterday, I heard about a new feature on Ford cars, set to role out next year. It's a computer chip that allows parents of teenagers to limit the car's speed to 80 miles per hour and keep the radio from turning up past half blast. I don't know about the radio, but they had the speed-limiting technology in my own teen years. It was called pulling off 3 of the spark plug wires.

Our adoption continues to progress nicely. We've gathered about 40% of the necessary funds, much of it from people who we barely know or don't know at all. One would think that a person would grow accustom to how uniquely God provides but it's still a shocker. He's good and He has some remarkable people out there.

One thing that is settling in more than ever is how much life will change with these two little ones. Zoe is a joy, but she didn't put us over the tipping point - we could still pretty much maintain our own patterns. These two....it's different. First of all, just having twins is enough to mess with your daytimer (do those things still exist?). When the twins are numbers 5 and 6 in the tribe, it really gets you to thinking twice about everything. Regular cars, houses, grocery lists, etc., no longer apply.

The best part is that the logistics are the least of the changes. I can't wait to see the fulness of what these two bring to our family.

Wood, hay and stubble, people....

2008-10-06T13:43:00.002-05:00

Great Kid(s)

2008-10-04T23:38:00.002-05:00

We were given a gift tonight; a cd full of photos from Nick Loux. They were shot last night at Zoe's Punkin Pancake Party, which was phantastic.

Even though most of the shots were of Zoe, one of my favorites didn't feature Zoe at all, because it reveals the heart of one of my other children with incredible accuracy.

Jackson is 15. I am completely unsure how we entered the time warp that got him there. A few weeks ago, he was 3 or 4, carrying around his stuffed animals and telling his preschool teacher "My parents don't pay much attention to me any more....". (True story! Later, when pressed for an explanation, he said "Well, everyone was telling her things and I had to tell her something!")

Here we are, years later. My little guy stands four inches taller than I do. He is also a doting big brother to Grayson, Zion, Zoe, Anna and Mercy. He shows remarkable tenderness to his little sisters. Nick's photo says it all.

Zoe / photos by Nick Loux

2008-10-04T12:37:00.003-05:00

Nick wandered around the house with Zoe for a while the other night and landed these plus a few more - check out his blog.

Look who's 2!

2008-10-01T22:49:00.003-05:00

Tomorrow will mark Zoe's second birthday. With all the excitement around the arrival of the twins, we can't forget that Zoe was the adoption forerunner! She's pictured here with her BFF LiLi, who is four months younger and seven shades lighter. Other than that, they're sisters to the core.

Thinking about her birth and arrival sent me to the archives for my favorite moments of racing to Vegas to get her!

This post featured our first glance at Zoe.

I'll never forget laying eyes on that dark head of hair. I had no idea that two years later it would point in all directions!

Our Las Vegas video update, featuring the POD soundtrack.

Zoe, we love you!

You have been a joy to our life and are so excited for you to grow big. You're the best big sister ever!

Missions in a Financial Crisis

2008-09-30T14:35:00.002-05:00

Judging from public reaction yesterday afternoon, you would have thought the sky had fallen. In reality, it was only the stock market, which plunged an interesting 777 points. While people weren’t lining up on the window sills like 1929, it’s still early in the week and we don’t yet know how this is going to land.

As missionaries who raise their own funds based on the benevolence of others, the staff of IHOP and other missions organizations around the world find themselves in a unique position. We would appear to be most affected by a financial downturn, when in reality, we have wrangled a certain insulation from it.

Before you write me off as crazy, think with me a little bit. If you’re a missionary, here are a few things to consider in these days of financial panic.

You cannot be fired.

Along with “do I have any money left?”, the question a lot of people are asking right now is “with the increase in expenses and the tightened credit market, will I still have a job in 3 months?”

I can’t tell you what will happen to the conventional job market, but I am positive of this - as a Christian worker, you are in one of the most unique rolls in the world. You can be relieved of your earthly assignment by a superior in your sending organization, but you can’t really be fired. The only thing that can separate you from the job God’s called you to do is your own conscious decision to quit. So long as you’re not quitting, you have a job to do. Don’t clean out your desk prematurely.

Even in times of crisis, nepotism works.

Anyone who’s ever worked at a family business knows that it’s nearly impossible for a supervisor to be impartial when it comes to family and non-family workers. Try as we might, it’s just too hard to separate family loyalties in the workplace.

For once in your life, this is going to work for you. You are not a hired gun, you’re the favorite son. God the Father picked you for this role Himself. Lack of income may mean the water gets shut off and the lights go out, but you’re still going to be a son, and there’s always room for a son. Your Father will see to it.

You’re already 2 steps removed from the problem.

At the risk of oversimplifying, our earthly economy is based in the concepts of supply and demand. Price and value are determined by a) how much stuff is available and b) how much demand there is for said stuff. It all comes down to what’s available and how many people need it.

In doing the work of the Father, you’re in a unique place of enjoying unlimited supply and being in unlimited demand. God provides - salvation, resources, vision, energy, passion, and yes, food! - so that you have unlimited supply. The need or demand for the things of God - particularly salvation - grows exponentially as the population of our planet grows. Even among those who have received it, there is a great need for ministry, training, healing, etc. Simply put, you (and people like you) are in great demand, and will be throughout eternity.

I don’t mean to make light of the looming crisis. It is real...and it’s not just about Wall Street fat cats. Innocent people will lose a lot of money through none of their own ill doing.

I do mean to draw a connection between a confident heart and the unique place one puts themselves in when they fully trust in God. Come what may, we’re in good hands - and it’s not an insurance company or a market analyst.

By popular demand.

2008-09-29T16:50:00.002-05:00

Up top, Zoe, who I suddenly realize is a big girl now, and then Mercy and Anna.

Time is of the essence. No kidding, Sherlock.

2008-09-29T10:21:00.001-05:00

After going from four kids to six via the miracle of an unexpected adoption last week, Kelsey and I are staring our schedules. As strange as it may sound to some, we had life figured out with four, ages 15, 11, 7 and nearly 2. We juggled prayer, work, fun, soccer, guitar lessons, and school with what felt like ‘a little difficulty, but now with twins, seemed to be with great ease.

That was so last week.

This week, our newborn twin girls have rocked our world. They are sweet as could be but apparently have little regard for any schedule that is not their own. In fact, if it does not involve a bottle or a diaper, they could care less....and we love them dearly, but it’s making us reevaluate a little.

Honestly, I like the changes I sense coming. Sometimes order only comes when it is forced upon us. I got my best grades in college when taking the heaviest schedule. My best preaching has happened on my busiest weeks. I’m most intentional with money when there’s not much of it. This clamp-down on our time is going to make us more efficient and in control of our time than ever.

Already, God brought a stranger to me for a 45 minute conversation challenging me to narrow my focus. The conversation dovetailed perfectly with what God had put in my heart. Order out of chaos. How Godly.

It is not a good comfortable thing to be hard pressed...but it’s a good thing. Sometimes the Lord uses circumstances to show yourself what you’re made of, and through the miracle of leaning on Him, you’re made of more than you thought you were. I’m not quite ready to pull a GWB and say “bring'm on...”, but I’ll go so far as to say “come what may, we will overcome.”

Onward, through the fog....

rb

Welcome home...

2008-09-27T22:20:00.003-05:00

How do you welcome your mom and newborn twin sisters home? You make a big ol' sign and stand by the glass near the gate. No one says 'welcome home' like Grayson. :-)

Your Money

2008-09-25T22:14:00.006-05:00

Congress certainly seems to have been thinking about your money today - so much so that according to the New York Times, talks about how to help you keep your money just broke down entirely. A fix is certainly on it's way, but no one can agree on when or how.

The wood, hay and stubble that we're so heavily vested in is going up in smoke, with or without Congressional intervention. Today, tomorrow, or a decade from now, it's going. Gone. In light of that, I have a bold request for you...an invitation to invest in something that will outlast anything Wall Street has.

Those of you that have been following this for a while know that a week ago, we flew to Florida on a few hours notice to adopt twin infant girls who were about to be put into the state foster care system. Tonight, those two little girls have names, a father and a mother, three brothers and a sister, a good hope and a good future.

I'm asking you to invest in that future.

I've mentioned the financial need for this adoption a couple of times, and frankly, I've been blown away by the responses from people. We've raised just over 25% of the $15,000 in legal and travel costs in just a week. In several cases, young people gave four weeks of their pay to this effort. This afternoon, someone I've never met - from Europe - sent us $1,000. It's been astounding to me how people have responded. That said, I want to extend that invitation one more time. Why?

Your financial portfolio is in freefall.

You might as well put your money in something that's going somewhere.

In one short week, these little girls have gone from the unknown of the foster care system to a destiny that includes growing up in the context of night and day prayer. They will mature in a loving family, surrounded by young adults who think that prayer and fasting are staples of Christianity. No graph can accurately portray that change of trajectory in seven days. Project it out over a lifetime, and this investment pays a return like you've never seen.

Adoption gains us equity in the case against abortion.

These twins, Anna River and Mercy Rain, join one other adopted daughter, Zoe (almost 2). It gives me great joy to lift my three daughters high and proclaim "This is what pro-life looks like."

Without going into details, it's remarkable our twins were born at all. Unfortunately, every day, children like them don't survive the womb. They are aborted, often because people believe that the children will be unwanted. Adoption is one way the church can send a clear prophetic signal - that we want the children that the world would reject.

This isn't about two little girls.

This is about thousands of children we want to see adopted.

If I've ever heard the Lord's voice on anything, I've heard Him speak to me on the issue of adoption, and the Word of the Lord to the church is this - "Go get them." That is what we intend to do.

In coming days, you're going to hear a lot about adoption from Kelsey and I. We are setting our face to raising money for others to adopt and putting adoption on the forefront of the church's agenda. Your giving into this need frees us up to spread the word about adoption.

Again, thanks to those of you who have already given so generously. For those of you who are wondering how you can help, I have two requests:

1) Go to this section of RandyandKelsey.com and give electronically or find out where to send a check.

2) Forward this post to friends you may have who love adoption and the prayer movement.
To date, the largest amounts have come in from people we don't even know who love the idea of adoption and the prayer movement converging. Send this post or others that you found really connected with you on to everyone you know.

This blog will return to it's regular faire of offbeat commentary soon. When it does, I'll be launching a second blog for the purpose of concentrating on the issue of adoption and the prayer movement. Meanwhile, I wanted to place the opportunity out there for many of you who have read along with us for a long time, perhaps as far back as our Cincinnati days.

If you've ever thought "I should do something...", I'm asking that you do it now. It is the investment opportunity of a lifetime.

Thanks,

Randy

Gifts from Uncle Steve...

2008-09-24T22:25:00.002-05:00

Peeps Rule

2008-09-23T21:18:00.002-05:00

I twitter my landing, and I get the twittered 'welcome home's. Nice. Then, 30 seconds after I walk into the house, a gorgeous Papa Johns pizza arrives, courtesy of a couple of my team members.

The fact that I harassed them into doing this should in no way color the sincerity of the gift.

Thanks a bunch, peeps!!! You rock!

Thoughts @ the airport

2008-09-23T15:50:00.002-05:00

I'm flying home today to be with the tribal base unit while Kels waits on the state of FL to verify we are, in fact, who we told them we are. Given the speed with which we went after these twins, I can't blame them for asking a few questions.

It's weird leaving her here, but I've also missed the rest of the kids back in KC. Oh for the soon coming day when we're all in one city, crammed under one roof, a glorious mess of elbows and toes.

Kinda feels like all of life shifted in the last five days. I went from having a moderately large family to having the sort of family that spurs total strangers to ask if perhaps you're Mormon. (I'm not, and to my knowledge, neither is Kelsey).

Beyond that, I am sort of pondering my own reaction with these twins. We hear about emergency situations from time to time, but this one was a no brainer - I had to go after them. Something has changed in me. I don't know where this leads, but I know there are others to go after, and I intend to rally an army to rescue them.

I've been hearing a lyric all day.

Oh the sound of salvation come
The sound of rescued ones
And all this for a king
Angels join to sing
'All for Christ our King!'

David Crowder

I'm telling you. I can hear the sound. And it's glorious.

I'm done. It is not cool to cry in the airport.

Dream on....

2008-09-23T10:40:00.002-05:00

Check out this amazing dream by Isabelle Loux.

I'm haunted by the line "Is there a mommy or a daddy here for me? Via her mom's blog.

"We were all building a brick town with houses in it. Our family was there, the Bohlender's kids were there (Randy and Kelsey were getting the twins), and several other specific individuals and families that we know. I (Isabelle) went up to these guys I didn't know, and asked when Randy and Kelsey's house would be done. He said that the town wouldn't be done when they get back, but their house would be done.

We were building houses out of bricks. The houses were for people who were coming back with children to adopt them. Mom (Tracie) was leaving, and I (Isabelle) said, "Where are you going?"
Mom said, "I have to go get them."
Isabelle said, "I don't want you to go."
But mom said, "But I have to go get them."

At the end of the dream Isabelle saw a little girl. She came up to Isabelle. Isabelle asked her name, but the little girl didn't know her own name and seemed all confused.

Isabelle said, "What do you mean you don't know your name.

The little girl asked, "Is there a Mommy or a Daddy here for me?"

----
Yes. There is. Bring it on.

Chilling @ the Sjogrens

2008-09-22T20:56:00.002-05:00

We met with our lawyer this morning in Tallahassee, then drove on down to the Tampa area to spend the evening with Steve and Janie Sjogren. If you haven't heard any Steve Stories, you haven't read my blog very long. It's been nice to share this time with them and introduce them to the fabulous duo, Anna and Mercy.

The house is quiet now. Kelsey and Janie scooted off to exchange some micro sized baby clothes for some other micro sized baby clothes. Steve gathered his gadgets and went to bed. The girls are dozing beside me and even the dog has lost interest in them. I've been video chatting with people across the nation showing off the girls.

There's a ton rolling around in my head....

We officially FILL the Suburban right now.
We need to pay for this miracle.*
I can't wait to see my boys and our other girl. Life feels incomplete without them near.
It's touched me how I've been able to call people and ask "Can you..." and they blurt out 'yes' without even knowing the details.
I'm SO jazzed to get to know the twins' biological aunt and uncle - they seem like amazing people and helped facilitate the most blog/twittered adoption I've ever known of.
I am a rich man in the truest respect of the word.

---

Thanks to those who've already helped bring these two home - they are truly rescued ones.

If you'd still like to contribute, you can mail a check or use the paypal button at the right. We're about 25% of the way there.

THANK YOU, from all of us.

Twin Picture of the Day. So Far.

2008-09-22T07:44:00.004-05:00

I know, I know. You used to read this for witty banter and personal insights and now all you want are baby pictures. I must appease their fans.

That's Anna River on the left, Mercy Rain on the right. Yes, I'm sure.

Oh, and while we've been hauling all over Florida with the Golden Girls, our boys have been having a blast with friends and Grandma. Take a look at these photos that showed up on facebook.

They tell me Zion insisted on painting that on his face. Good boy.

Driving Across Florida...

2008-09-21T17:40:00.003-05:00

We spent the morning with the good folks of Coast Community Church this morning. They had us tell a quick version of our adoption story, which I'm realizing takes longer to tell than it actually took to happen. Afterwords we hung out with Robert Pooley and some of his team for a great Mexican dinner. Robert and I realized we knew all the same cool people.

After eating, we climbed in the rental and drove east on I-10, also known in marketing circles as The Land Starbucks Forgot. I left Gulf Breeze thinking "I'll grab a coffee in an exit or two." Three hours later, I'm in Tallahassee and still haven't had coffee.

Tomorrow morning we meet our lawyer. It makes me feel like a rock star to have a lawyer named Madonna. It also conjures up quite a mental picture, so I'll be sure and fill you in.

Actually, carrying these girls around is enough to make one feel like a rock star. They gather more attention than Bono at a refuge camp. The favorite comments so far are "Are they twins?" and (muttered under their breath in reference to Kelsey....) "Look at her - already in her jeans. Makes me sick!"."

Good morning....

2008-09-21T07:23:00.004-05:00

We're up, if not at'm, on a fine Sunday morning in the Florida panhandle. The girls ate around 11pm, at 3am, and are getting ready again now. Not a bad night at all, really. I'm traditionally a very light sleeper and am beginning to remember what it means to sleep very, very hard. Exhaustion can do that for you.

This morning, if all the planets align and the girls cooperate, we're going to Coast Community Church. Coast is pastored by Robert Pooley, one of those characters whose blog I read yet have never actually met face to face. In fact, we had never talked on the phone until Thursday, when I was desperately searching for a lawyer to get to the hospital before the State of Florida did.

After church, we'll head east and south to spend the night somewhere before hitting Tampa to say Hola! to the Sjogrens and then down to Sarasota where Kelsey will hole up with friends as I fly back to KC. Kelsey and the twins will follow in a few days when all the legalities are done.

Not sure what Budget Rental Cars is going to say about having picked a car up in New Orleans and dropping it at Tampa. I hope I'm not buying this car...

One reader asked about the vitals - here's what we know...

Ht. 18 inches / 18 1/4 inches
Wt. 5 2 5 7
DOB Sept 16
Hair/eye "color" both brown/brown

Not sure who's oldest. I just grew confident yesterday in telling them apart myself. They're fraternal, but they do look pretty similar at this stage. Doggone cute.

Video Update...

2008-09-20T17:11:00.001-05:00

Announcing...

2008-09-20T12:42:00.001-05:00

Left to right, Anna River, the more fiery of the two, and Mercy Rain, the quieter one.

We got these two on the 9th anniversary of IHOP going 24/7. There names are reflective of intercession/movement and the anointing of God from falling from heaven.

Amen. Let's stand.

Why my life rocks right now.

2008-09-20T11:00:00.000-05:00

Friends hauling two younger boys to their first soccer game of the season.
Other friends giving me text message updates of the game's progress while Jackson emails me photos.
Live-in Grandma is doting on Zoe.
Two girls we've dubbed 'the eggrolls' snoozing side by side in a hotel pack-n-play.
Smart-as-a-whip wife working on making 1+1=4 so we can afford to live this tribal existence.

Two of a kind....

2008-09-20T06:27:00.002-05:00

6am, up and at'm, girls!

Meet the girls....

2008-09-19T15:02:00.006-05:00

Dear friends, if you've not been following the twitternado that we've been posting, then you don't know that we have expanded our family.

We have been praying about adoption for some time and twins have been on our heart for years, so yesterday, when I received a blog comment from someone who said their sister in law just had twins and wanted to give them up for adoption, we went into hypersonic mode.

It was literally a race against time to get the children adopted before they went into state care, except they were in another state - Florida! By 10:30pm we were in New Orleans, renting a car and racing towards Pensacola. We checked into a hotel at 3AM and were at the hospital by 8:30AM to meet with the birth mom.

Mid-afternoon, she relinquished her rights and our attorney helped us walk the rest out with the hospital. We left the hospital with our girls around 4pm. In between there some where we bought two car seats, a couple of blankets and a pack of diapers. Remember, we didn't plan on doing this. At least not this week.

We still need prayer - we're tired and now have TWO NEWBORNS! Sorry. I giggle a lot when I say that. We also need to pay for these dolls. They were significantly cheaper than our last adoption, but with travel will run into the $15k range.

THANK YOU for all of those who have contributed so generously - we are truly humbled. You are playing a part of this crazy revolution. Feast your eyes, peeps.

update

2008-09-19T15:02:00.002-05:00

If you're not following the twitter feed....

Birth mom signed consent a few minutes ago - yeah buddy! This has been a wild ride. Praise GOD for her sister and brother in law who have helped usher this through.

Next stop - the nursery where the hospital gives the babies to the lawyer and the Bohlenders give a fat check to the lawyer and the Bohlenders get two yet unnamed balls of caucasian/asian lovin!

Pictures later. I PROMISE.

update from the hospital

2008-09-19T03:02:00.004-05:00

We are on the ground...

2008-09-19T03:02:00.002-05:00

I'm writing this at 3am, and the end of what has been the craziest day ever...so far.

At the 6am prayer meeting, I wrote some very specific things in my journal. Literally a minute or two later, Cory Russell got up and prayed it word for word. I remember thinking "Wow. There's something on that....".

Shortly thereafter, I got a blog comment from someone who had a family member who was struggling and had twin girls they were considering putting up for adoption. I tracked them down and we were on the phone in minutes. Did I mention it wasn't 8am yet?

At 9am, we had a meeting with good friends already scheduled. Did I mention they own an adoption agency? We spent our alloted time working the phones to lawyers and social workers. The next few hours were a blur of crossed phone calls and confusion, but at 2:30pm the birth mom asked "Could you come down here? I think I want you to have my girls....".

We flew to Dallas. We flew to New Orleans. We drove the last 200 miles. And now we're here. Tomorrow morning we meet with the birth mom. If all goes well, we have twins in the afternoon.

I'm crashing. Just a reminder - Prayer and funding. If you can only do one, pray!

Update

2008-09-18T20:41:00.002-05:00

OK, I know it sounds wild, but I had no idea when I got up this morning that I'd be heading to Florida to pick up twin baby girls.

Kelsey and I are in Dallas waiting for a connecting flight right now. People have asked what we need, so here you go:

PRAYER - that God would grant us favor with the birth mom, who is a troubled young woman. She is scheduled to sign papers tomorrow morning. Pray for favor when we meet her at 8:30am.

FUNDS - this will not be the most expensive adoption in the world, but we're still in need of about $10,000-$12,000 for legal fees, etc. plus travel expenses. THANKS TO THOSE WHO HAVE ALREADY HELPED - if you'd like to join the troop, MASH DOWN HERE and paypal it, or mail us a check.

Next update will be late late tonight from Florida. Oh my word. I think I have six kids.

unbelievable

2008-09-18T15:57:00.001-05:00

No time for details right now - will blog more later but follow the twitter NOW....

Hear ye, Hear ye.

2008-09-17T22:27:00.002-05:00

I received an iPod for my 39th birthday. I have used it multiple times every day in the 2+ years since. I listen to a fair amount of music but have also become an absolute podcast fiend.

People sometimes ask what podcasted sermons I listen to. Confession time: Almost zero. Back in the late eighties and early nineties, when I was finishing college and starting out in ministry, I made a conscious effort not to listen to a lot of preaching. I was watching people listen to others and, in their formative years, quickly beginning to mimic their heroes. I wanted to find my own rhythm to speak by, which probably explains some of my quirkiness while teaching. It does not explain my quirkiness the rest of the time.

That said, here are a two podcasts that I don't miss and why...

Learn out Loud's Great Speeches in History
Throughout history, there have been iconic speeches by politicians and others. This podcast has recently carries such classics as MLK's I have a Dream, Nixon's Checker's Speech, and Newton Minow's 1961 Television is a Vast Wasteland. These speeches were history makers and you need to hear them to be a well rounded individual.

The Moth
The Moth is a storytelling venue in NYC. It features authors, celebrities, and regular people telling stories from their life. One week, it's techno artist Moby...the next week, it's the Manhattan cab driver....and you never know who's good until the dust clears.

The rules are thus - in front of a live audience, and without notes. The stories are often hilarious, and the audiences very kind.

The Moth is a diamond in the rough. Listening to it, you're reminded that public speaking is generally ranked high on things people fear, and these people are not professional story tellers. You actually find yourself on edge along with them, hoping they pull it out and loving it when they do.

Disclaimer - a few of the Moth podcasts contain inappropriate language but are clearly marked EXPLICIT on the podcast and easily avoided.

Second Disclaimer - I would LOVE to speak at The Moth!

A (W)Holy Disturbing Story

2008-09-16T12:35:00.003-05:00

I sent this out as an email blast this AM - in case it didn't hit your inbox....

I’m writing this from the prayer room - disturbed to my core by a story I heard last night. This morning, I felt compelled to share with you. Sometimes a holy disturbance is worth shouting from the rooftops.

Kelsey and I had dinner with several couples who work in the field of adoption last night. We are working with one couple to help them launch an adoption agency in Kansas City. The other couple is laboring in another city as social workers for a non-Christian agency. They told us of how many adoption agencies are so profit driven that it daily affects decisions about who gets which babies - and if those babies are offered for adopted at all.

Recently, they had a young woman call in to the agency for help, single and afraid. They asked her a few questions about her age, race and physical condition, during which they determined she needed some prenatal care. An appointment was set for her to come in and make arrangements for her prenatal care so that she could place a healthy baby up for adoption. This particular agency’s owner is a non-believer and was excited about helping this woman because she had identified herself as hispanic, and hispanic babies are easy to place.

When the woman arrived, they realized she was Puerto Rican and much darker skinned than they expected her to be. The owner of the agency suddenly decided that the child would be ‘too black’ to find a home for. The owner refused to allow the social worker to pay for the ultrasound that the girl needed - it didn’t seem like a good investment for the agency - and the girl left, probably more afraid of having her baby than she was when she walked in. She was denied assistance because of the color of her skin - something that would be illegal to do if it involved a bus seat or a hamburger, but is perfectly legal in the adoption world.

We don’t know what happened to this baby, but there is a very real chance it was aborted rather than adopted because the profit margin was too low for the adoption agency.

Friends, there has to be a better way. This should not happen in any city in America where a church exists. When a pregnant young woman chooses LIFE, she should find help, not resistance. It’s no wonder 4,000 babies are aborted every day in America - in the short term, we have made death an easier choice than LIFE.

Lack of finances or someone being ‘too black’ should never inhibit something God is favor of. Knowing that adoption is in God’s heart - both for the babies of young women and for each of us - we want to do all we can to make it affordable and available to believers everywhere, as well as adopt more children ourselves.

We’re meeting this week with some of the individuals who helped us connect with Zoe’s birth mom. They feel led by the Lord to have an agency in Kansas City. We believe it has something to do with the proximity of the House of Prayer and raising these babies as a type of Samuel, growing up in the house of the Lord.

We need your help.

Please pray for us and our participation in the launching of an adoption agency here in Kansas City that will change the way adoption happens, offering care to the mothers that goes far beyond ‘sign here’.

Additionally, nearly every week we are emailed about ‘emergency situations’ - babies about to be born with no home to go to because they’re the wrong color or don’t fit into the middle class American dream/nightmare. We are currently updating our adoption home study to be ready to take in children at a moments notice.

I am reminded daily that our own Zoe was one of these emergency situations. You can take a look at the photo at left to see how these emergencies turn out. :)

It is becoming more and more impressed upon me that this operates best in a missions-funded context. By raising our own salary, we free ourselves to help people adopt, unencumbered by the profit-driven decisions that are making adoption expensive and difficult.

Would you consider supporting us as we lean into this calling?

We need immediate funds to reduce some unexpected debt, bolster our monthly support to match our growing expenses, and then fund the adoptions themselves. We are only days away from receiving our updated home study and are ready and willing now to take more children into our family - especially these that some would call unwanted.

Beyond that, we want to subsidize thousands of adoptions into the prayer movement - and insure that no young woman is ever turned away from adopting her child for being ‘too black’, to be marketable.

If you'd like more information about how you can send some help our way, drop me an email - rbohlender(at)gmail.com or mash on the paypal button in the Partnering section of RandyandKelsey.com.

Thanks for your prayer and financial support in this season. You are making a difference in the lives of children - for eternity.

Neue in print...

2008-09-15T22:27:00.005-05:00

Recently, NeueMinistry.com posted this nifty flash preview of their soon-to-be-mailed quarterly leadership journal. My piece starts on page 183. You can peek at the layout online, but will probably need to wrangle yourself a copy to read it for real.

EDIT: I just discovered that you actually can click to zoom big enough to read the print, but it's going to drive you crazy. Just get over it and subscribe.

An idea I would not have had...

2008-09-15T08:50:00.003-05:00

Creativity knows no bounds.

Yesterday, Jackson and I were tooling around in Grandma's Volvo and we passed a house that boasted of a tree in the front yard. Unfortunately, two significant limbs had been cut off, leaving those unsightly woodcuts for all to see.

Ever conscious of the potential for property values to plummet, these home owners decided to do something about it: Paint faces on the woodcuts! Because nothing says class like these paintings.

We wondered - if you buy their house, will they repaint them with your likeness?

updated cribbage

2008-09-14T19:56:00.004-05:00

We worked our tails off to get the house ready to list. Seriously, I have no tail to speak of anymore. It's quite remarkable.

Saturday, we were on from 8am to 1am, then finished up this morning. Props to Jill and Luis for hauling hiney alongside of us for the whole stretch. Luis faced my Garage Monster. For this alone, he is worth his weight in platinum.

Click on any photos for the Large Print Bifocal Edition.

This is the new Urban Loft version of the Bohlender front room. Jill says that urn hauled the Dead Sea Scrolls to the US. She's serious. I said Freud diagnosed someone sitting on those couches.

Artwork! We have artwork! And a bench that supposedly once served as a chicken execution site. Hard to think about.

Assorted Macs not included, but dig the mirror and couch where we used to have a gargantuan iMac station.

And of course, the kitchen looks great since the Great American Kitchen Project.

Open House

2008-09-14T12:51:00.001-05:00

Our house is on the market and looks amazing.

Open house today - 2-4pm.

new from Bob Sorge

2008-09-12T07:10:00.003-05:00

A few days ago I was handed a copy of Bob Sorge's new book, Power of the Blood.

I need to preface this with a disclaimer. I know Bob personally, and he is ranked in the top 7 nicest people on the planet. He really should be in the top 5, and two of those in the top 7 are on oxygen, so he will be soon one way or another. Bob, his wife, Marci, and their three grown children are all plugged in here at IHOP. I've been blessed to spend time around their table. I love the Sorges...but I still carried his book around for several days before cracking the binding.

Last night, I picked the book up and read six pages before going to bed. Six pages isn't like reading War and Peace. What can you say in six pages? Apparently a lot, if you're Bob Sorge. Bob is a writer's writer. I read his stuff and literally say "Wow" out loud. It can be awkward in public places.

I finished chapter one this morning, and what struck me is the entire chapter is about God. That may seem like an odd thing to say, but when was the last time you read a book about God? Most books in the Christian world right now are not about God as much as they are about you.

Your walk with God.
Your search for God.
God's Perfect Will for Your Life.
How You can Make a Difference
Finding Your Inner Monk

Ad nauseum infinitum...

It's much easier to write about you and I than it is to write about God. You and I change, bend, twist in the wind...if the book gets it wrong, no big deal. Wait long enough and what you wrote ends up being true about somebody.

It's different with an unchanging God. You write about God much more concisely. You want to get it right the first time. You don't want to write a sentence about God only to have to retract it later because you got it wrong.

Chapter 1, How God Feels About the Cross, explores the emotion God felt watching His Son on the cross, and how those emotions affect God's dealings with those who accept or reject His blood.

Just reading the first six pages of Power of the Blood made me go to bed thinking differently about God. It seems like six pages written about God are better than a thousand written elsewhere. I'm looking forward to chapter two, once I can come to terms with chapter one.

ha!

2008-09-11T10:36:00.002-05:00

I would have paid money to watch this - Shawn Blanc's Asian iPhone Invasion.

the art of changing strategy...

2008-09-11T05:18:00.003-05:00

We had a major strategy change last night. We did not choose it. It chose us.

At not-quite-2, Zoe can sometimes prove to be a light sleeper. Not every night...not even most nights, but once in a while, she doesn't sleep very well, and it means one of us gets up with her.

//stop// OK, let me be clear. This post is about change, not parenting methods. We have four children. No two are the same. I don't care what books you read or what worked for your kids, other than consistency and love, nothing is universal in the way of childcare wisdom, so keep your theories to yourself and don't clog up the comment section. //stop//

Most of the time she wakes up we can get her right back to sleep with a reassuring word or by replacing the binky. On the rare occasion that those tactics fail, we need to get her out of the crib to console her and sometimes end up sitting on the couch, back to the armrest, Zoe on our chest, feet up, holding her until she goes back to sleep. Some of you need to refer back to the italics above after that. Feel free.

We're changing tactics. We're not doing that anymore. It's not that we're being terribly strategic about it - the system actually worked pretty well and we wouldn't have changed on our own - but we gave that couch away and replaced it with a couch from our basement. The replacement couch has no arms. It's this swoopy modern thing that looks like it was swiped from a NYC loft and used by a hip couple without children.

Last night, Zoe had a bit of a rough time. Kelsey was gracious enough to get up with her. As she did, I could tell by the cry that this was not going to be a 'replace the binky' affair...and for a moment, I panicked. What do we do now? We can't sit on that couch in the same old way?!? Will she ever sleep again?

Of course, in time, she slept. Kelsey innovated, a new way was found, progress was made, good was done, and the princess was back asleep. Meanwhile, I lay awake, thinking that I rarely find a new way of doing things until the old way is no longer a possibility.

I am almost always forced into innovation. In spite of it's negative connotation, the status quo has it's up side. It's proven. It works. And you don't need to change anything.

Until it doesn't work anymore...then you're dealing with the double whammy of failing and the pain of letting go of your old way.

Anyone finding armless couches your life? What's God saying to you? In His infinite wisdom, God replaces the comfort couches when He needs us to think of new ways of being and doing.

There are New Ways coming to our lives, and few of us would ever perceive of them, much less pursue them, if our Old Ways continued to work.

New wine must be poured into new wineskins. - Jesus

Monday Morning Perspective...

2008-09-08T08:53:00.002-05:00

I'm parked on a hard plastic chair in the back of Grayson's math class, where I am the designated Parent Volunteer on Monday mornings. Part of the agreement of having your children in The Daniel Academy is four hours of service per week, so this is my Monday morning assignment. It's a pretty cushy job, actually. The kids are well behaved and there's not a lot of prep work so the teacher does most everything.

Sarah Palin and whats-his-name are in Lees Summit, MO this morning. It would seem from the twitterfog that the uber hip and otherwise unoccupied have all assembled there. Can't help but think they would have never turned out to see the presidential candidate himself. It's amazing the amount of energy this VP pick has brought to the race. It makes the democratic superman seem almost....mortal. Go Sistah Kryptonite.

Crazy busy weekend...relisted the house for sale. We need the space, particularly given that we're pushing hard to finish our home study ASAP because of a few needy little ones we've caught wind of.

Just between you, me and the interwebs, we are going to shoot for another adoption - fast. More info to follow as soon as I have it. Trust me. We're going to need your help. :-)

This just in from PalinWatch 08: Jackson is wandering the line spreading the rumor that Palin did not come with McCain, causing hockey, soccer, gymnastics and shooting club moms great dismay. AAAAGHH. Whose kid is that?

The Burrito Prayer Movement

2008-09-05T05:10:00.000-05:00

On a hot, muggy evening a few months ago, I was walking down the street with Grayson, my 11 year old. On our way to a prayer meeting, we passed a homeless guy who asked for money for dinner. I diverted my eyes and kept walking. Grayson, unsure of the protocol on this sort of thing, grabbed my arm and said “Dad, that guy’s hungry!”.

I didn’t have time to explain to Grayson that A) giving that guy $5 would not fix his real problems or that B) the $5 we’d give him would most likely go to booze or drugs. Instead, I gave him a shorter answer - one that makes me cringe to this day.

“Gray, we can’t help him. We’re on our way to a prayer meeting.”

Even at 11, my son instantly recognized that as one of the dumbest things ever verbalized. Even now as I sit alone and type it out, I’m horrified. I actually said that sentence out loud, in public, to a child.

As long as I can remember, there’s been a disconnect between doing and praying. Churches had a tendency to lean hard one way or the other - activism or intercession. In connecting with a body of believers, you chose between addressing social ills or committing to going deep with God. It never occurred to us that addressing social ills might mean going deep with God or vice versa. We didn’t consider that to try to do one while ignoring the other was to be far less than Jesus told us to be.

The Pharisees once tried to get a pass on this by asking Jesus, “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” If you can determine what’s most important and focus on it, then you can stake out your defense against all the other lesser to-do’s. Jesus, as good with words as the next guy, fired right back:

" 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'”

With that, the Pharisees let out a subtle sigh of relief. “Ok. We have the greatest one nailed. The second is a biggie, but, it’s second...”

Ever the Master of the dramatic pause, Jesus then dropped the bomb. “All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."

“All the law and the prophets” meant that everything God had established in their history and promised for their future. They dangled between those connection points - the back then and the soon to come - and getting from one to another meant loving God and loving people.

Jesus drew a dynamic connection between our vertical relationship and our horizontal relationships...our depth in God and our breadth of influence. He would have questioned the validity of any church or believer who managed to neglect God for the sake of people, or in my case, people for the sake of God.

When my sons eyes met mine, I saw what no dad wants to see - disappointment. Both of us were embarrassed at my answer about being to busy going to a prayer meeting to help a homeless guy. Smelling blood, Grayson stepped in to finish me off.

“Dad, let’s buy him a burrito...I’ll pay for it with my own money.”

Trying to fight the tears that were welling up at the outer edges of my eyes, I walked into a restaurant with my son and watched him order the biggest burrito ever assembled - one that would ultimately end up the size of a football. While the Burrito Assembly Crew worked on the monstrosity, Grayson turned his attention to the salsa bar, gathering two containers of each of the four options. I wondered when was the last time this guy had been given any options.

Armed with his bomb of a burrito and accompanying salsa ensemble, Grayson marched to where we’d passed the guy on the curb. Shaking off a momentary wave of nervousness, he stepped up. “Sir...”, he said, “I bought you a burrito to show you that God loves you. It’s right here, along with some different kinds of salsa.”

The dark eyes of a man who had been mistreated for years looked at him in disbelief. “What?” the man asked gruffly. Grayson repeated his pitch. As disbelief passed, the man took the burrito and grasped Grayson’s hand. Leveling his gaze into my son’s eyes, he spoke man to a man. “Thank you. Thank you very much.”

Walking away, Grayson was 10 feet all. He had questions about the man’s behavior, and so I explained the best I could that life on the street can be very hard, affecting people’s mental and spiritual state. Nearing the prayer meeting, he said “Oh man - I should have prayed for him! That would have been awesome!”

In the next week, Grayson spent every dime he had buying burritos for homeless guys, laying hands on them and praying for them. He was going for it - bound and determined to see someone set free.

After his third burrito prayer meeting, he walked away saying “It’s great that he’s got food, but I want to see him healed. Dad, I’m gonna get someone healed! I’m gonna get one!”

I believe him. Everything God has said in the past and everything He tells us about the future points to it.

GBF

2008-09-01T05:29:00.002-05:00

It's the first full week of the month, meaning we're starting our monthly Global Bridegroom Fast. We are committed to this three day fast as a way to join our voice with that of the Spirit of God in saying "come quickly" to His Son.

This would probably drive serious business gurus crazy, because the 'business' side of things grinds to a near halt during these three days. We cancel a lot of meetings and the meetings we do hold suffer from a disproportionate number of people claiming 'fasting head'.

In a world that champions the biggest, strongest and fastest, this seems a little counter-intuitive. After all, who would willing make themselves smallest, weakest and slowest? Here are three reasons why we do this.

Even in a fasting and praying community, it's good to intentionally re-center the corporate heart.
There is beauty and befuddlement in 24/7 prayer. The beauty is mostly on the prayer side. The 24/7 portion of the equation means things can get a little scattered as the 4pm leader makes a decision that carries over to the 4am leader yet those two are rarely in the same room. These three days are our family time before God. It makes for a certain viscosity that keeps the gears from clashing.

Jesus said to.
OK, even in the Greek, it's hard to make the case for the words "Global Bridegroom Fast", but in His teaching, He often made the assumption that His followers would deny themselves as an expression of pursuing Him. It was part and parcel of Jesus' perspective. We choose to formalize it into 3 days because we don't naturally do what He expected. The format is to discipline our time, not impress God.

The Sermon on the Mount does not come naturally.
We rarely embrace meekness on the first try. Humility is not our natural state. Fasting seems to put our thought processes on time-delay, allowing for what is within us to be revealed. Sometimes it's not pretty, but it's better to have it exposed during a 3 day period of voluntary weakness than in the pressure cooker of events to come at the end of the age. As Mike Bickle often says, "God, shock me now, don't shock me later....".

So here we are. Monday morning of the GBF. We make ourselves weak and wait.

Saturday evening reflections

2008-08-30T21:16:00.002-05:00

I'm beginning to realize how busy our summer was.

Today, I cleaned out the basement storage room, fixed the broken light socket, took a load of stuff to storage, returned a ton of stuff to Home Depot, grabbed some frozen custard with the kids, went to the gym, and returned home for a bike ride with the boys and thought "Wow. We kind of did nothing today...." Best day of nothing I've had in a long, long time.

Surfing the web, I'm finding a lot to like about the Republican VP choice. I know people are freaking out about her lack of foreign policy experience, but to be frank, Alaska is a bit of a foreign country. She's probably more like the Prime Minister of Extreme Canada than the governor of a state. I also discovered today that her husband is a snowmobile racer. Call me shallow but this sort of sealed the deal for me.

It appears that New Orleans could get mashed again by this storm. My most vivid memory from Katrina was Matt Lockett having a hard time getting across the country because he couldn't buy gas, and my friend Dennis giving cell phone updates from the gulf region of Mississippi, allocating just a few minutes a day because they had no electricity and no idea when it was coming. Say a prayer for the people in that region tonight.

Full disclosure.

2008-08-30T17:46:00.002-05:00

We all have dark seasons in our lives. Apparently this was one of mine. That's Grayson at 2 and me at...maybe 32? hahahahahaha

What's Neue with You.

2008-08-29T22:10:00.002-05:00

Without the expected email blast, the folks at Relevant Media Group launched the Neue site. Neue is both a website and a quarterly journal for people in ministry, set to go to print in October.

I'll be a contributing blogger for Neue. You can find my stuff mixed in with about eight others on the lower left sidebar or the blog page.

Check out what's Neue.

a fun day with the team...

2008-08-28T23:10:00.003-05:00

TheCall Senior Staff met most of the day.

Historically, there has not been a Senior Staff team, so a number of us declared ourselves Senior Staff and formed into a team. It was a brilliant move, and one I fully supported. You can do that when you draw the org chart.

I don't know if I've laughed or prayed as hard in a meeting as I did today. It was that cool.

I'll leave you with a photo taken by Annie, my faithful runner at TheCall DC. Annie is a jewel - she managed to keep my supply of vitamin water in stock, get my boys from The Mall to the hotel, chase down internet passwords and forty other things. After working her like crazy and sending her on a variety of goofy assignments in a madhouse environment, I discovered she was sixteen years old. I probably violated every child labor law in the books at TheCall DC.

Anyhow, she loved Zoe and captured this shot.

hot off your printer!

2008-08-26T09:43:00.003-05:00

Our latest newsletter is available for download!

Photos of TheCall!
Cute Kids!
Family and Ministry Update!

Get it all here folks...

The ups and downs of raising your own funds.

2008-08-24T14:16:00.002-05:00

We've been missionaries for five years now. Five years. That boggles my mind.

One of the continuing struggles is to get a newsletter out. It's not as easy as it sounds. Right now I've hit the classic missionary dilemma. I've designed a four page, killer-informative, beautifully laid out with multiple colorful photographs type newsletter. It will do an amazing job of letting supporters know what we're doing.

And it costs a bundle to print! Aaaaghghghgh!!!

From the "Dwindling Faith in Gov't Department:

2008-08-22T21:22:00.002-05:00

If I didn't know Ann Kimmel I'd question this story....but I do know her, and this is pitiful. Just pitiful.

Whoops.

2008-08-22T20:01:00.002-05:00

My friend, Cameron, recently declined an invite to pray at the DNC. He blogs about the decision here.

The comments on the post are all over the map, but these are my favorite two.

On the nightstand....

2008-08-22T19:12:00.003-05:00

The past couple of days, I've been reading Mayflower by Christopher Hilton. It's a fascinating look at what we know (and don't know) about the passengers of the Mayflower.

While reading historical works like this, I'm always reminded of how normal these people were. They were susceptible to the same pitfalls as we are - pride, ignorance and cable television.

Well, 2 out of 3 anyway.

Busted

2008-08-22T13:27:00.001-05:00

Rick Warren and the faith forum

2008-08-22T07:38:00.003-05:00

A few weeks back, I posted my wonderings about Rick Warren interviewing the candidates, and I have to back up for a minute. I didn't intend my comments to be particularly negative towards him, but I can see how people might have taken it that way.

In the interest of fairness, I have to say I was completely impressed by Warren's questions. "Which US Supreme Court Judge would you not have nominated?" was flat out brilliant. I felt he also spent significant time on the hard issues that were important to me.

While I still lament the days when ministers made leaders more nervous than comfortable, I think the Faith Forum was very productive and helpful.

There. Done with that bowl of crow.

Who had this idea anyway?

2008-08-20T05:12:00.002-05:00

I'm always interested in how groups make decisions, primarily because of my conviction that the more people involved in a decision or a process, the more opportunity there is to really goof it up.

Yesterday, I went into the restroom at the Baltimore airport. It was your average airport restroom. Tile everywhere, music playing and a lot of men trying to juggle their carry-ons. Then I saw something that was obviously a group decision.

On a shelf above the urinal, there sat a nice vase with fresh flowers. Yes, fresh flowers. In the men's room of the airport. It wasn't quite a breath of fresh air, but it certainly did add a touch of elegance to the place....then I saw the sticker on the wall below the flowers.

Just under the shelf was a 3x5 sticker, black with white letters, that said "AIRPORT PROPERTY - DO NOT TAKE."

I did a double take. Exactly what committee was so acutely aware of aesthetics that they decided to put flowers in the john, yet so distrusting of the human psyche that they needed to apply a sticker that said, in essence..."enjoy the flowers, you thief! We want you to have a pleasant experience, but just between you, me and the urinal, we figure you're going to rip us off."

Sometimes, the solution is worse than the problem was to begin with.

Backstage on Saturday...

2008-08-19T22:50:00.003-05:00

Rebekah Fancher took this shot of Samuel Judah Engle and our Zion. You can check out some of her other great photos here.

the 24 hr mark

2008-08-19T22:31:00.002-05:00

I've been in Kansas City for 24 hours now. I can't quite say 'home' for 24 hrs, because we didn't home until much after midnight to to The Great Shuttle Snafu That Shall Remain Vague, but we're here now.

Today was spent restocking the fridge, going through the pile of bills and checks (more bills than checks, I'm afraid) and attending to a conference call of California leaders regarding TheCall California. I'm sensing momentum out there.

Tonight we attended a Back to School meeting, as school starts tomorrow morning. Grayson is elated in that 'sharpen-every-pencil-in-the-house' way. He loves school. Jackson and Zion are going to simply home school this year. Zion's excited because he thinks he's getting a computer. Jackson's just happy to be up late making cookies.

Tomorrow, I get to return to the swing of the prayer room. Amen. Let's stand.

TheCall, Rapid Fire Style

2008-08-19T11:39:00.004-05:00

I never saw more than a few minutes of the TV feed. How'd it look?

Props to Steve Brown and Co. The stage looked incredible. I was particularly impressed with the way you rigged the roof to dump gallons and gallons of accumulated rain water on Phil and Megan. Genius, pure genius.

I believe we can fill Qualcomm Stadium on November 1. Do you?

Mike Huckabee is a nice man, even to stage hands.

Someone, figure out how much bottled water we had. Divide by four. That's the order for California.

Someone on the IT team was following @thecalldc twitter. TheCall Twitterati was twittering so feverishly that the guy's phone went into seizures and needed to be rebooted. If you can't tweet with the big dogs....

As twittered by @thecalldc, Heather Clark's drummer is the Chuck Norris of percussion. He doesn't pound the drums. He intimidates them into vibrating. Unbelievable, especially up close.

I ran the day after TheCall on pure adrenaline. The second day after, I was ready to lay down for hours.

Shuttle drivers - never have so few done so much for so many with so little for so long. And I'm sorry you had to double back because we forgot that bag when you dropped us at BWI.